Remember that Japanese artist arrested for 3D data files of her vulva? Here's why she needed 3D vulva data in the first place - she has made a kayak which is shaped like her vulva, and while paddling it looks like she's coming out of the vagina. I'd say, "that's a weird reason to scan your vagina," but then I remembered this is Japan, and reminded myself I should never be surprised about Japan.

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Don't tell Japan about 3d printed cocks, because they have obscenity laws which censor realistic depictions of genitalia, and it turns out that includes 3d-printer data of a woman's naked genitals. Now, if you know anything about 3D printed files, they're a whole lot of very unsexy data. But, since it could be fed into a 3D printer so that out pops a faithful rendition of artist Megumi Igarashi's vulva, that is a violation of the law. Sure, it's possible to view and render a 3D data file on the computer monitor, so it's probably not that far from the unsexy data contained in a compressed JPEG, but it just goes to show that, as technology improves, people try to find ever more creative ways to make it sexier.

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Take notice, reality stars, twelve-year-olds, and erotica writers: stop using these names for vaginas. I was surprised when va-jay-jay took off, because I didn't know anyone who actually watched Gray's Anatomy, but apparently it has stuck. The article is rather thin, certainly optimised for SEO and little else, but it's lovely to see so many in one place - and the video at the end actually is pretty good.

Note: many of the terms seem to be describing the vulva, not the vagina. They weren't being pedantic enough.

In Sweden, artist Carolina Falkholt was commissioned to paint a large mural in a new secondary school (about 7th grade to 10th grade in the US), with the subject related to technology, science and the school's proximity to the sea. What did Falkholt paint? A huge happy vagina! School hasn't started yet, so no fragile little darlings have been damaged by the painted vagina at this time, but people are anxiously wondering what will happen when that time comes. First of all: murals don't go up in twenty minutes; someone saw what was going on and thought, "eh, I trust this artist's sensibility." Second: vagina? Really? Someone better look through their anatomy books: that's a vulva, sir. However, this is evidence of why Sweden is the kind of place I should be living: for one, that they've got artists around who think, "school full of minors? Vagina it is!", and nobody bothered to check with the artist that this wasn't some horrible mistake -- and, finally, rather than swiftly painting over it before anyone could see it, everyone said, "hold on, let's talk about this", including the principal himself, thus getting the artwork into every damned newspaper and news website in Sweden, ensuring every one of the school's future students can take a good, long look at it. Skal, Sweden!

How hard is it to get rid of a couch that looks like an engorged vulva? Pretty damn hard, it seems. Five days ago, someone posted on the Portland Craigslist that she was selling the vagina loveseat she had made in art school, asking $600. Googling "vagina couch" as I often do, I ran across a listing from 2008 where a woman named Willow was trying to sell the exact same couch in Mendocinco California. Looks like it's tough to sell a vagina couch these days -- not only did Willow fail to find a buyer five years ago, she packed it up and moved it ten hours to the north, where it has been languishing in an unloved corner of her apartment since, probably getting covered in cat fur and old grocery bags and that windbreaker she can't find because it's all shoved down in the folds and is covered in cat hair and grocery bags. At least it wasn't a $20K vagina couch, you're really looking for a specialized buyer there. In Portland, there must be at least twenty people in the sexually-themed furniture market at the under-$1,000 pricetag.

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In 2006 in London, Amora: The Acadamy of Sex & Relationships was looking for a wall of penises, vaginas, and boobs. They talked to a photographer, hoping he'll shove his lens into people's private parts, but that photographer had met artist Jamie McCartney before and referred him. McCartney decided 2D was much too boring for such a significant installation. He instead created an expanse of castings, 3D penises, boobs, and vulvas jutting out from the wall, or, as I like to think of it, the funnest rock-climbing wall ever invented!

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The website is pretty clear to say "DON'T PUT THIS SHIT ON YOURSELVES, WOMEN," which makes me a bit queasy to think about a bottled scent imitating a woman's vagina. With it's comfortable "roll-on applicator", where the hell are you supposed to put this slightly yellow *shudder* substance? On your penis? On the cat? Around your tomato plants to keep the rabbits away? Maybe somebody just wanted to get some use out of their witty "smellmeand.com" domain, or maybe it's all a ploy to get people to put their vagina-logo wallpaper on their PCs, thereby helping identify douches. The male kind, not the kind designed to counteract this product.