July has been crazy: I tagged along with the Sex~Kitten crew on their first 'city review,' a whirlwind tour of Minneapolis. The issue should be available at Sex~Kitten's website soon; I even wrote some stuff for it. I've also taken on many of the 'pre-press' duties of Sex~Kitten, setting up articles, ads, and formatting -- giving me the opportunity to flex some of my l33t design skills. Hopefully it won't suck.
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Jordan Matter photography has a set of classy nudes on their website -- artistic photos, not your average 'spread the labia' sets that equal pornography. Most are so candid, so public, it makes you wonder if there really are partly-nude women wandering New York, and nobody cares enough to notice the people around them, save one intrepid photographer.
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Sex sells, even when it comes to high-end server components. No nudity -- nor even undergarments -- but whoever this eBay seller is, he's got a handful of traditionally attractive women working in his warehouse's front office. They don't do it with every item, but I've been watching his auctions for several months now, and he's always got a couple pictures of girlies holding hard drive caddies or network adapters.
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Come on, this has to be a satirical website. At Big Sausage Pizza, women give blowjobs...when the penis is inserted through a hole cut in the middle of a pizza. What pot-smoking pizza-delivery guy came up with this fantasy?!? "Dude, this last delivery, the chick was so hot....she shoulda given me a pizza-doughnut blow job!" *ding* lightbulbs appear above a half-dozen drug-addled heads.
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For those confused about the act, this website tells you how to make love today. Not just any day -- TODAY! There's a new one tomorrow, so don't fall behind, slackers!
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If you know someone with a pornography problem, send 'em an e-card to let them know they're fucked up. Not me -- dammit! I don't have a porn problem...it's part of my job to look at naked photos of sexy ladies! See, here's an example -- this issue of...

Of course she'll video-chat with you right now -- this soapy lady, clearly taken from a canned set of photos, is ready for your masturbatory chats, no matter what time of day. Still, I wouldn't kick her out of my bath...

One day a while back, Larry Elder interviewed this lady (last article) and her husband about their pornographic careers. She held her ground, and did a good job of showing she's not some drug-addled slut trying to make enough for her next pot purchase. First, she gets me on her side like that on Laryr Elder, then she takes a bath and puts the picture someplace where I could find it. How dare she tempt me so!

She's at the spa in her little sundress -- and it's bathtime! She's a little too 'Playboy' for my liking, but that's mostly in her hair and makeup...I'm not looking too closely at that.

These photos are kinda crappy, but she's very darn soapy. She's also a natural beauty, which is nice after the link above this one.

Sexy Jordan Capri bathes for your entertainment, starting in water-soaked undies but slipping into the bubble bath without too much delay.

Tawnee Stone is smiling brightly, as though she has no idea she's being photographed naked in the bath. "I'm what?!? And you still took pictures?!?" Oh, yes they did, and you appear to have liked it. Her fellow bather, Raven Riley, undulates sexily and soapily in front of reproduction caveman art, drinking her wine in the tub and looking a mix of tired and annoyed. Somewhere between the two of them there's a middle ground of pleasantly relaxed being watched in the tub, without hostility or false amusement, like Shayla Model. While Shayla's smile is a bit repetitive, she at least looks like she's enjoying herself, without overacting happy or appearing bored.

Couples are actually rather rare in soapy pictorals; For The Girls has a set of a man and woman gettin' sloppy in the bubble bath, and looking like they're actually enjoying themselves just a little.

Like huge soapy breasts, but hate the face? SweaterMeat has pictures for you! The body is pleasantly zaftig, a little on the chubby side (but, then, who isn't?) but the lack of face makes these seem a bit absent.

Elyssa takes a hot bubble bath, but from the looks of it the hottest thing there is Elyssa.


Shower sets don't usually get soapy enough for my liking, but Megan does a good job of covering herself in bubbles.

Teen Jasmin has a nice set -- two pages worth of her lounging in a very bubbly bath.

Viagra has practical uses, you know -- when prescribed to children with breathing problems, it's ability to dilate blood vessels helps flow through the lungs. Two problems: Viagra has it's blindness-causing risks (when compared to not breathing is worth the risk), and I'd be concerned about embarrassing "tent pitching". Again, compared to 'not breathing'...

Owen Wilson, attending the XXX: 30 Porn-Star Portraits exhibit, met porn star Sean Michaels. Polite small-talk was made, and Owen excused himself. Now, Mr. Michaels has turned to the media to get in touch with Owen, offering a set of "Ass Lickers" DVDs as a sign of friendship. Creepy, no? Sure, it's probably a publicity stunt, but the stalkerish overtones are a bit spooky.

Podcasts are the new venue for erotic stories, sex ed, and pornography -- according to the Wall Street Journal, and when something's big enough to catch their attention, it's worth keeping an eye on.

Male bisexuality is a myth -- so if you've been using it as an excuse to cover up your gayness, well, your cover is blown now, so just give in, buy a rainbow bumper sticker for your Honda, put on a pair of daisy-duke shorts, and blow-comb your hair. You've been wanting to all these years, you know.

AXE body spray has gained fame with a very likely, but unforseen, audience: early-teens. Now, this is wrong on so many levels: first, that the youths believe the TV commercials that say Axe will get them laid in a store changing room. Next, that sex-ed is so taboo that it's not available to young teens who'd be willing have sex with any woman that'll let them. Finally, that they somehow believe that spraying MORE of the stinky crap will make them even more irresistable than the commercials lead them to believe. I suppose, if anything, this will preclude sex ed: no girl would get close enough to an AXE-bathed lad to even approximate sex. (I, for one, believe women stroke their asses with frying pans made from my used bodyspray cans. It's gotta be true - I saw it on TV!)

Jet Set Lara is yet another courtesan with a blog...but, due to the manufactured fiction of others of this genre, there's a bit of disbelief in her writing. She claims 10,000-pounds for a minimum booking ($20,000 for two days?), and an Ivy-league chemical engineering background. Who can pass up a story of a sexy ladygeek getting paid more for two days than a month of full-time at mimimum wage? Her blog is found at jetsetblog.com

Japan tries to make condoms fun -- you know, because the acts that require use of a condom are unpleasant enough, why should condom wearing be as bad? Oh, I know, they're not as much fun as going without, but with HIV and pregnancy on the rise, Japan is worried. They, of course, blame the lack of condom use in pornography -- when porn stars go without, why should regular joes use 'em? They go on to say that the condom-eschewing masses believe pornography shows the correct way to have sex, because "...Japan does not have full and proper sex education for students." Hmmm....this sounds familiar...wait, what did the US do when HIV and teen pregnancy started to run wild and condom use was deemed "uncool?" Oh, yeah -- develop "abstinence only" sex ed which gives little info about sex and says condoms are useless. When the Obvious is looking the US and Japan in the face, both countries are lucky to have a prudish government that can see past the obvious.

It's almost mesmerizing: a limp female corpse plummets, bouncing off bubbles as she falls. Well, I don't know about the corpse thing, but she doesn't seem to feel much pain. Click on her with your mouse, and you can control her travel; I found flinging her off the right or left edge of the screen was very satisfying.

What's a business to do, when the obvious domain name for their business is already owned by pornographers? Buy it, of course! Sticky Fingers, a barbecue rib chain of restaurants, opted to pay $6,000 for stickyfingers.com, rather than change the name of their business, or expecting customers to use some sense and not assume that the obvious domain name will always get you what you're looking for. Did the whole "whitehouse.com" debacle teach us nothing?

An uninvitied mom found 70 books in the school library that she considers objectional. Judy Blume's Forever is one, as well as books on homosexuality. She has "something against this explicit stuff being pandered to our children"....if, by pandering, means that the books are available to children who seek it out on their own accord and require a book to have explicit, dangerous, ininformed, and reckless sexual fantasies and activities. I'd wager, if these are books the library took even the slightest care in purchasing, that it's better children read these than getting their sex ed from their friends or cable TV.

When the school district, one with the highest teen pregnancy rate in the state, holds a meeting to get community input on sex ed materials, who shows up? No parents, that's for sure. Of course, this will be selectively forgotten when some parent decides to blame sex ed for teaching their kids how to get pregnant. One former student did attend and viewed the prospective curriculum: "I learned all types of birth control," she said. "I'm not ready to have no kids."