Sweden is a lot more liberal than the U.S., and it manifests itself in so many cute ways. For example, while Sesame Street might sing about body parts like toes and fingers and tongues, a children's program in Sweden might sing about penises and vaginas. Note there's no real sexual content in the song, it's more about how everybody has one or the other and we pee out of them, which if you think about it is kinda weird that Americans and other conservative countries think that should be hidden from young children for some reason. Just look at most of the complaints: many people claim it shouldn't be seen by young children, but few explain why.

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Last year, the Riksforbundet For Sexuell Upplysning -- I believe that means "Sexual Applying For Rick's Bucket" -- came to the realization that nobody in Sweden had ever talked about female masturbation before, so there wasn't a word for it. So, now they're voting on what word to use when talking about ladies diddling themselves. The best candidates so far are "klittra", "pulla" and "selfa," thus eliminating three future product names at IKEA. Some of the words appear to come from website visitors, but you should know that Sweden already has a gender-neutral word for masturbation, called "onani", which, incidentally, is also not an IKEA product. This contest is for a female-specific term for masturbation, and if that helps Swedes find the little man in the boat, all the more power to them.

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In Sweden, artist Carolina Falkholt was commissioned to paint a large mural in a new secondary school (about 7th grade to 10th grade in the US), with the subject related to technology, science and the school's proximity to the sea. What did Falkholt paint? A huge happy vagina! School hasn't started yet, so no fragile little darlings have been damaged by the painted vagina at this time, but people are anxiously wondering what will happen when that time comes. First of all: murals don't go up in twenty minutes; someone saw what was going on and thought, "eh, I trust this artist's sensibility." Second: vagina? Really? Someone better look through their anatomy books: that's a vulva, sir. However, this is evidence of why Sweden is the kind of place I should be living: for one, that they've got artists around who think, "school full of minors? Vagina it is!", and nobody bothered to check with the artist that this wasn't some horrible mistake -- and, finally, rather than swiftly painting over it before anyone could see it, everyone said, "hold on, let's talk about this", including the principal himself, thus getting the artwork into every damned newspaper and news website in Sweden, ensuring every one of the school's future students can take a good, long look at it. Skal, Sweden!

As if most hotels aren't also fuck-hotels, this one takes their position as a love grotto quite seriously. The Venus Garden provides toys, environments, and even instruction on how to get your fuck on. Oh, no, don't get all orgyish about it - it's about love, not just sex. Those crafty Swedish, making hotel sex something pure and wholesome.

Yet again, Sweden proves they're a better country than the United States: the entire nation of Sweden has legalized same-sex marriage, thus making those Swedish Bikini Team (wait, what?) fantasies all the more hotter, amirite? The United States should fear this development, though - when sinewy, blonde busty women can marry each other, what chance to fat, grubby Americans have? None, that's who.