Rammstein, being, well, Rammstein, released a box set of their album Liebe Ist Fur Alle Da, complete with six rubber penises. Here's a description:

This unique version of Rammstein's sixth studio album, Liebe Ist Fur All Da, comes expansively packaged in a flight case style box. The package contains: the deluxe edition version of the album, six sex toys (numerically corresponding to each member of the band), handcuffs and lubricant.

Sadly, the dildos weren't molded from the bandmembers, but beggars can't be choosers when it comes to a dildo ensemble.

Being a limited edition and all, it's not in "print" anymore, but even Amazon shows it as available from some sellers.

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Phone sex is like erotica, in that you can create totally unrealistic fantasies that would make sex a lot less sexy if you tried it. Like this guy's fantasy of just shoving dildo after dildo into a woman's rectum. Humans aren't rubber duckies, a shapely shell with an empty volume inside - unless that's your kink, which is OK by me.

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Designer Balasz Sarmai has come up with toy designs for The Avengers. Sex toy designs, that is. They all seem to have some thoughtful features: of course, the Hulk is huge and green, Hawkeye focuses in on the target, Black Widow is stealthy - Marvel needs to license this like now, otherwise they're missing an opportunity! It's too bad Doc Johnson already came out with lame versions called "Super Hung Heroes", although their ""Hulk" looks about the same.

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Etsy is the place to go if you want to buy artisinal bookmarks, toaster cozies, knitted caps that look like things, and - hey! - they've got artisinal sex toys, too! The plus and the minus of this brings up a dark hole - sex toys aren't really regulated by anyone, although the FDA kinda, sorta does, so there's no really knowing if what you're getting is safe and clean. So, be careful out there, everyone: I'd gather that Etsy sellers are probably cleaner than that guy selling dildoes out of the back of his van, and if you're buying dildoes out of the back of the van, you probably don't know what Etsy is, so go figure. At the very least, these are absolute works of art, so maybe you get an abstract one, put it on your mantle, and save it for a rainy day.

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Digging through these old Easyriders is fun - you learn so much! I found the sextoy below in one of their 'recommended purchases', right below the beer-can sling you hang around your neck and a folding shotgun. An audio-controlled vibrator? That's awfully high-tech for the seventies; I didn't even know similar products still exist, updated for the iPod generation. One difference is (and the picture doesn't show it) that the 1970s version had a separate amp box, which doesn't sound too comfortable during practical use. I imagine that, a handy person could take out the low-powered amp it came with and put in a nice Mcintosh tube amp for rumblier lows. That's the thing with off-the-shelf audio equipment: it's always a good idea to replace the important parts with something a little more high-end.

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You know, there are times when I look at that foot-long vibrant purple fake penis in the window of the local adult bookstore and I think, "why aren't there more realistic fake penises in this big wild world?" The New York Toy Collective has teamed up with a 3d printing upstart to produce anatomically correct plastic penises scanned directly from the real thing. My first reaction, just looking at the picture? My god, they're tiny. Eh, but who am I to judge, somebody paid a couple hundred bucks for that little plastic cock, so they must not be complaining.

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People on Etsy are fucking crazy. They can make the weirdest shit into the weirdest other shit, and people pay money for it. Just look at this gallery of penisified sex toys available at Etsy. Yes, that cigar really is marketed as a dildo. In fact, a quick search for the word 'dildo' on Etsy gets a BUNCH of results. The number of sexually frustrated people on Etsy must be enormous, but I probably could have figured that out anyways if I thought about it long enough.

Via. Plus, it seems this week is turning into toy week here at RBT. It's still Masturbation Month for a couple days anyways!