Posts Tagged 'Dating'

More Men, More Sex!

Here's the clues to a better sex life, ladies: be around more men. No, it's not that there's cheating going on, or that spontaneous gangbangs appear more often in your life. It's the unsexy term "sperm competition", a gladiatorial spectacle known, it's that when men perceive they're one of many potential mates, they're more interested in having sex with you. Potential is the key here: the woman doesn't need to do anything, except happily enjoy more sex due to the neanderthal brain of her partner who wants to get in there before anyone else does.


Fake Facebook Babe!

More entrepreneurial spirit: this website will not actually get you laid, but it'll make your Facebook page look like you're getting some. For $40, they'll violate all sorts of Facebook terms of service and be your fake girlfriend for a certain amount of time. Better make sure it's only for a short time, though: drag it out too long and your Mom will insist "Becky" come along to watch fireworks at the 4th of July, and that'd be an uncomfortable conversation, you know. Well, depending on how deep your pockets are: for the right amount of money, you can get a "Becky" to be both a Facebook girlfriend and a sometimes lover. It all hinges on your budget, buddy.


Date A Stripper!

As if it wasn't fucking obvious enough, DJ Mick wants y'all to date strippers. Whoever wrote this is kind of a dick, since they promote all the "Daddy Issues" and "Stripper = Crazy" bullshit, because the purpose of finding a girlfriend is to avoid all that. Crazy chicks with daddy issues do not inherently equal good sex and are found everywhere, so use your smarts when looking for a date. Find a stripper who's cool and then you get the best of both worlds. Then, her real boyfriend will probably kick your tit-obsessed ass to the curb, but, hey, at least you tried.