Because FleshLight has a lot of money to throw around, the dating-tips tweety Simple Pickup -- which seems to only focus on skeevy pickup lines -- has been given $10,000, which they're hiding around LA hidden inside fleshlights. So, West-Coasters, if you find a FleshLight lying in the street, just shove your fingers in there and pull out what's inside! If you're lucky, it'll be money -- if not, well...you might need to get some shots, but fortune favors the bold, don't let it discourage you!

Via.

New York City, long known for the descreteness of its residents, held a contest to find the tiniest penis in town. You didn't have to BE from Brooklyn, you just had to show up and enter yourself in the tiny penis competition, which should get you an award right there. Some guy called Nick "The Delivery Man" Gilronan won, so you can be happy to know at least you don't have a Gilronian-sized penis.