I really need to update my Netflix queue. IO9 has compiled the greatest sexy sci-fi films ever. All I've seen are Barbarella, Galaxina (which isn't that sexy, unless you count Avery Schreiber's moustache), and Edward Penishands. I initially thought that last one was something my drunken mind had imagined, but it apparently really did exist. It was chosen for viewing by a girl who wanted to sleep with me, but I was too young and naiive to notice, and she was too young and naiive to realize that, if you want to get sexy with someone, Edward Penishands is probably not the best choice.

You may not know this, but way back in the early days of the internet I wrote erotica at various places, primarily EroticStories.com, but other places, too, and even some long-lost blogs that I don't even remember the URL for. Anyhow, Gracie has been talking about getting into the erotica business again, so I'm going through my old files to see if there's anything to publish to test the waters. Crashland was originally held back to submit to erotica digests, but I never got around to it. This magical electronic world of ours lets people self-publish ebooks with nary any trouble, so Crashland is now available at Smashwords and on Amazon. I'm even inkling to do some new writing, too, so I'll keep you posted.

What? Oh, what's the story about? It's a sci-fi story of an interstellar delivery person who crashlands her ship on an unfamiliar planet, and goes in search of help. She finds the person she was sent to meet, who turns out to be one of the most powerful men on the planet, and romance grows while she waits for rescue.

My college buddies only wanted to see Total Recall when it came out because of the promise of a tri-tittied hooker in it, and although I don't think they got the movie, they sure did get a good look at a ten-foot-tall multi-boobed woman, so they were happy. You may have heard there's a Total Recall remake coming out, and, sure enough, they gotta throw in a three-boobed woman in there. It wouldn't be Total Recall without her. Note the clumsily-positioned strip of fabric; I'll bet she's anatomically correct, just like the original, under there.

Via.

Pervirella runs from the masturbating monster, is saved by Amazons, but is taken captive. Sorry, I think my random sentence generator went haywire...no, no - that's really the only way to explain this clip, from a much larger naughty movie called Pervirella, as discovered by - who else? - a website full of scifi geeks. Congratulations, io9, that masturbating monster will haunt my dreams.

What's sexier than a movie written by and for men who have probably had serious difficulty getting laid during their life? Nothing, that's how. Topless Robot, an erectionally-arousing phrase if I ever heard one, has compiled a list of the 7 sexiest film sex scenes ever. Computer-Human sex? VR-coitus-interruptus in Demolition Man? Methinks the TR writer has had his own difficulty in accomplishing sex himself.