Like Wednesday, I really gotta stop blogging while hungry. It's not like I'm that picky: I'll eat a penis cake that looks like a penis. I know it's Betty Crocker and not a real penis. It's no big deal to me. But, when I take my penis cake to eat in the park, people get bitchy when you whip it out. This lady has figured out how to eat a penis cake without the police being called, and for that she's a hero.

What more heinous thing could happen than this? Several cars are broken into in one neighborhood, but one person had more than just CDs and pens from banks in their car: this woman had $500 in sex toys stolen from her trunk. Of course, they weren't "her" sex toys - they were for somebody else's bachelorette party.... riiiiighhhttt..... but if it was a bunch of stuff, it probably was really a bachelorette party. If she was doing right, $500 in good sex toys isn't really a whole lot. You can get a whole lot of stupid penis-shaped straws and blow-up sheep for $500, and it's no wonder it lived in her car. Nobody leaves the good stuff that far out of reach.

Via.