I know I've been down on Cosmopolitan's poor sex position techniques in the past, so I suppose I better go to a more institutional source. While I can't completely support the Mormon Church - who designed their magic underwear anyway? So unsexy - I can totally get behind a couple of Mormon missionaries dryhumping each other. It has to be about as successful as regular Mormon sex, I'll bet.

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Need to get a tattoo, but unable to procure the funds or locate a licensed and safe tattoo artist? Make a jailhouse tattoo gun yourself, and get a tattoo in the safety of your own bathroom.

Via.

I haven't got a fucking thing to add to this list, because this is pretty much the basic how-to for good sex. Hit half of these every time you're getting laid, and disappointment will be far, far away. Most of the time. I love a good titfuck once in a while, so there's always candy letters to still stick in the frosting of the sex cake, or something like that, I don't know, I forgot what I was typing when I got to the titfuck part.