Posts Tagged 'Bands'

Band Sluts!

There's plenty of ways to tell if somebody is a huge slut: tattoo placement, reputation, sticking her hand down your pants without an invitation...but sometimes you need a simple way to tell. Ask her what her favorite band is, and that'll tell you a lot. At the top of the promiscumeter: Nirvana and Metallica, which probably mostly means thirty-something middle-managers who like to get her freak on after hours. I can totally roll with that, no problems here. The least slutty? Coldplay, Adele, Lady Gaga, and Katy Perry, and Kings of Leon. The those middle three are easy to explain: the only people who answer them are 14 and wishing they were wild in a safe and secure way. The Coldplay and Kings of Leon fans are married and trying to make sure they show up at church a couple times a month so nobody starts to wonder. As for me, send of the Gorillaz and Daft Punk babes: they're twenty-something, they rank high on the promiscumeter, and they're probably worth talking to, too.

White Stripes Breakup!

The White Stripes have broken up. First reaction: I thought they broke up years ago. Second reaction: Aw, who wouldn't be sad about the White Stripes breaking up? Their version of Dolly Parton's Jolene makes the hairs stand up on the back of my neck. Parton's version carried sadness, but the White Stripe's version seeps outright pain. It's too bad that the only way to listen to Jack White is to buy albums from any of his other three hundred bands that he's touring with right now.