I hope it's purely coincidence that National Masturbation Month coincides with World Naked Gardening Day, which just happens to be today. Because the last time I masturbated in my back yard, it did not turn out the way I expected. So many screaming people, all at once. Anyhow, nudists garden like that all the time, so here's your chance to try it out, hoe around, plant your seed, plow that rut - dammit, it all sounds like sex anyway. Enjoy yourself anyhow.