Masturbation Terror!

Tim Ferriss, productivity guru extraordinaire, is pushing the acronymnously-named NOBNOM. "Nob-nom" might sound like a cheeky name for fellatio, but it's actually quite the opposite: "no booze, no masturbation" is its goal, and if you follow that plan, you'll be more productive.

Now, I can see how booze can interfere with productivity, but if you're working Mr. Ferriss' four-hour-work-week, you clearly can't afford time for a rum-and-coke and a quick jerk to clear your mind.

All this absurdity - beyond the absurdity that a four-hour-work-week actually requires full-time attention - comes down to the question: why are we so scared of masturbation? It goes back a long way, that the self-abuse that releases sperm is reducing a man's verility. Not, so, says the article above: all this masturbation-hate can be traced back to one self-loathing person in 1712, who published a much-promoted pamphlet about how masturbation is destroying society.

The realization that masturbation isn't so bad isn't a new revelation, though; smart people have been disproving it for many years, like this excellent article from a 1945 "men's health" magazine:

"Therefore it is evident that if one does approve of masturbation, if one feels that a moderate amount of masturbation is not harmful, if one feels that there is good and sufficient reason for it, then there is no evidence that it will seriously injure health."

Basically, as pretty much the rules for every sexual fetish and practice, "if it ain't hurting anybody, go ahead and do it."

So, kids, don't listen to He-Man, he doesn't know what the fuck he's talking about.


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