It's a fact, everybody: the insides of people's ears are erogenous zones. Not the curly part you can see - it's the place you touch deep, deep inside your skull that you can only reach with Q-tips. Gracie always tells me that I make an "O Face" when cleaning out my ears and she is fucking right. What I didn't know is that there's places you can go and have other people clean out your ears for you. If that's not two inches away from prostitution, I don't know what is. From the article, "There are stories of customers leaving wives for ear pickers and a life of in-home ear pleasure." Now that's what I would have liked to see in the movie Pretty Woman. Guy falling for cheap hooker with big teeth? Who cares. Guy falls for chick who touches his brain via his ear canal? That's a god-damned keeper right there.

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