Cohabitation: For Sex!

The only reason to move in together before marriage is to have sex, says The American Council For Duh. Wait, what about coed, non-relationship living arrangements? Oh, those aren't boyfriend-girlfriend, they don't count. What about people who move in together and begin having sex right after being married? Oh, that's different, because they're married. Why that's different, I couldn't tell you from the article; you just know. The article declares how, statistically, people dating don't last if they're sleeping together - but they're dating, and I don't understand who expects those to last anyhow. "While it's possible that a couple having sex before marriage will one day make a lifelong commitment, it is statistically more likely they won't," says experts promoting a not-so-new book, which could easily be edited to say, "A couple watching baseball together could possibly marry, but it's statistically more likely they won't." "People who take long strolls on the beach while dating could get married, but most don't." Duh, they're dating, you asshole. Society's pressure on young adults to get married before having sex doesn't sound all that great, either, Doctor Obviouses. While abstaining couples might possibly end up in an abusive relationship because of the pressure to marry, many don't - but that's just the statistics talking, not some fear-mongering because won't somebody please think of the children, you know. Oh, and, yes, the article is for young, pure girls: the only mention of men is to paint them in the villain's costume of how sexual liberation is giving men the freedom to fuck without consequence. They warn these young, untouched flowers of innocence: Cohabiting is growing in America, and young women should not kid themselves. It's all about the sex. Here's news for you: those women absolutely, positively are not kidding themselves in the least: they choose to move in with the guy so he can stick his dick in her, much to her orgasmic rapture. Oh, and maybe have somebody to help with the laundry and rent and take them out to dinner once in a while. Women are completely happy to have minimal-strings-attached sex, but people mistakenly take the lamentations of a dissolved relationship as proof the situation should never exist; blame the fact that you let him fuck you, and then you don't have to accept the complexities of her being a bitch or him being an asshole or neither of you having taken stock of the other person's personality enough to properly judge your compatibility. Sex is simpler to blame. History is full of abstinent suicides over one relationship or another - society's pressure to do it right, or not at all, has been fucking up kids for centuries, not casual sex.

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